Kuchipudi Sensual Journeys
The characters are supposed to be a couple of scarecrows, but it is a bit strange and I cannot think what was running through my head when I wrote it. Probably I'd lent the brain cell to someone, or perhaps I sneezed it out. I offer it only as an example of how not to do dialect because it is bloody difficult to read. Oh yes, and I used Lord Lucan as a nom dee ploom because I can see the old family seat from my window. Or I could if the snow would let up. I don't expect a TPA greater than 1.1.1., but you can please yourselves, and I'm sure you will"Interstishul' yer say?"There I is, sat in a corner of the local's bar in the 'Jovial Tar'. What a bloody daft name that be. 'Twere the Jolly Sailor afore all they buggers from up London moved inter t'village an' landlord thort 'twere too commin fer the likes o' they, so 'ee got the brewry ter change it. Anyways, I'm wi my mate George an' ee's just used this big werd."S'right," says George, blowin the froth off 'is beer. I ain't never too. Oh, shit, I thought, she's one of those, those, um, she-males. Oh, gross... NO, WAIT! It's the zucchini. She's still got that fuckin' zucchini in her! My entry must have surprised her more than she let on, and she couldn't get the little feller out in time."OH, God," she murmured, "Oh, I — "My cock was even bigger now, a full inch protruding above my shorts against my stomach. She was looking directly at it, and to my shock, she suddenly turned her head sideways and tried to take it into her mouth.The funny thing is, I'd watched that videotape of the card game probably ten times all told. I'd heard Natalie Winston call Ms. Lee a "quantity queen." Hell, I'd even heard Ms. Lee tell the other ladies that if she thought any of her students had a good six inches she'd be — how was it she put it? — conjugating all the verbs he wanted for him after school. And I knew that I had a good eight, maybe even nine inches.But until that point, I swear it had never occurred to me to put the two of.
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